Sarah Guirguis We all need to learn it and know how to do it by heart. The art of saying no to people sometimes. However, if you’re the type of friend to always say no and you’re a master at coming up with new excuses for every occasion, this guide is not for you. We’re talking this time to those who don’t know how to say no when they need/want to. They feel stuck every time they are presented with an invitation and are not used to setting boundaries.
There are various scenarios where you should normally apply boundaries. For example, if someone you’re not close to is adamant and insists on meeting up with you when you have other priorities that week, feel very free to say no. You can hang out with them when you have time for it and you actually feel like it; there’s no rush. Prioritize the friends who mean the most to you. That’s the only way you can build more meaningful relationships. If you spend equal time with everyone you know, you’re probably missing out on the chance to connect on deeper levels.
Another great example is when you’ve been spending all your time with this one person and he/she got so used to doing everything with you. They always invite you to go places together all day, every. single. day. That’s the extreme on the other side of the pendulum. You don’t want all your time to be honed in on just one or two people, either. You would need to branch out a little to get rid of sly traces of codependency. Picture how you would alternatively like to be spending your time, and begin pursuing that.
Of course, there are many other reasons to say no and set boundaries, such as needing to take a social break for a while, and be with family or have some me-time. We only talked about two settings you could be experiencing right now. Without further ado, here are different ways to say ‘no’ without sounding mean or unintentionally hurtful:
- I really wish I could but I can’t this time.
- I’m honored but unfortunately I can’t make it.
- If there were two of me, one of them would definitely be there.
- Sad to say that my schedule is completely full this week.
- Sorry, I already made plans for tonight.
- No, thanks. But it sounds like fun so count me in next time.
- I can’t this time. Raincheck?
- Thank you for thinking of me, but I’m sorry, I can’t make it.
